When Healing Doesn’t Work The Way We’re Taught

This Isn’t How We’re Taught Healing Is Supposed to Work

Most people are taught a simple rule about healing:

If something hurts, something is wrong. If something is wrong, it needs to be fixed. And if it doesn’t improve, you just haven’t found the right solution yet.

That rule sounds logical.

It just doesn’t match reality for a lot of people.

Especially the ones who have already done everything they were told to do.

When the Body Keeps Speaking Anyway

This is the pattern I see over and over.

Someone has pain, tension, anxiety, exhaustion, or a constant sense of internal pressure. They see professionals. They follow plans. They check the boxes.

Sometimes the tests come back “normal.” Sometimes there’s a diagnosis — but the treatment doesn’t actually change how they feel.

So they adapt. They learn how to manage it. They learn how to keep functioning.

And still… something doesn’t resolve.

At some point, the question shifts from “What’s wrong with me?” to:

“Why does this keep happening if nothing is technically wrong?”

A Real Outcome

Recently, someone commented on a post I shared and gave permission for me to pass this along:

“I went to Shawn for a few sessions and also talked to a life coach. A month or two after following their advice the shooting pains down both my legs stopped.

I waited a few weeks and the pains never came back. I was able to cancel the hip replacement.

I was skeptical at first. Like how are my pains associated with emotions?

However, I went in with an open mind. Now, no more anxiety/depression medication, shooting pains, and I feel a lot better physically and mentally.”

I want to be very clear about this.

Nothing was ignored. Nothing was forced. Nothing was “talked away.”

What Was Actually Changing

The body doesn’t only respond to injuries or structural problems.

It also responds to unresolved stress — the kind that never had a chance to discharge.

Stress that was endured. Stress that had to be pushed through. Stress that the nervous system learned to carry because there wasn’t another option at the time.

Over time, that load doesn’t disappear. It shows up as signals.

Pain. Tension. Anxiety. Exhaustion. Emotional numbness.

Not as punishment. Not as failure.

As communication.

Why Coping Often Isn’t Enough

Most approaches focus on management:

• Managing pain

• Managing stress

• Managing emotions

That can keep someone functional. But functionality isn’t the same as resolution.

When the underlying pressure hasn’t been released, the nervous system keeps compensating. And compensation always costs something.

This is why people often say:

“I thought I dealt with this already… so why is it still here?”

The Part That’s Rarely Addressed

According to how we’re taught, healing is supposed to be linear.

But the nervous system doesn’t work that way.

When unresolved stress is finally addressed — not managed, not suppressed — the body often no longer needs to signal.

Not because it was convinced. Not because it was overridden.

But because the pressure it was carrying is no longer there.

If This Feels Familiar

If nothing is “wrong,” but something doesn’t feel right…

If you’ve done the work and still feel stuck in the same loops…

If your body seems to be speaking louder the longer it’s ignored…

That’s not a personal failure.

It’s information.

Where to Go From Here

If this hit something in you —

if you recognized yourself in it —

The next step isn’t trying harder.

It’s getting clear on what’s actually running your system.

I offer a free Discovery Session where we:

• Talk through what you’re experiencing
• Identify the specific survival pattern behind it
• Look at how it’s showing up in your body, relationships, or work
• Determine whether interrupting it makes sense for you

This isn’t therapy.
It’s not a “sample session.”

It’s clarity.

No pressure.
No fixing on the call.
No obligation.

Just a direct look at what’s underneath everything.

If you’d like to understand how this works before deciding anything, you can learn more about the Discovery Session here:

👉 Learn About the Discovery Call

— Shawn